F*ck Me: A Memoir

  I recently posted a poll for my followers  on Instagram asking what element of a first date guarantees a second. I offered options such as: compatible lifestyles, things in common, great conversation, similar values and upbringings, and more. I mean, those are factors we all claim we prioritize in choosing a partner, right? Well, the overwhelming response was none of the above. In a nearly unanimous vote, chemistry won as the most crucial factor in deciding if someone is datable or not. So, let’s talk about chemistry. What is ‘chemistry’? Some might say it has to do with physical attraction, but I disagree.   We’ve all had that experience when we’ve been almost unwillingly and irresistibly attracted to someone we wouldn’t ordinarily call ‘beautiful’ or ‘handsome’. But it’s there, we can’t ignore it, and it compels us to get closer. Yes, chemistry is so much more than good looks. It’s unique and undeniable; it’s seductive, intriguing and powerful, and full of o...

I’ve been on the dating apps for over four years, and I’ve probably been on 100 unsuccessful first dates. Yes, 100 bad dates. In fact, I’ve had so many bad experiences, I could write a book about it ( oh yeah, I did ) . I mentioned this to a childhood friend the other day and he was shocked. “How did you end up on 100 dates with men you didn't like?" Good question , I thought. Really good question. How have I sifted through hundreds – maybe thousands – of profiles and ended up with so many obviously inappropriate matches? Well, I blame the apps. From the first time I saw them, I knew they weren’t for me. They’re just so… random. Matching with someone feels as arbitrary as picking a card out of a deck– do you want a three of diamonds or a jack of clubs? Red or black? Face card or number card? High number or low number? That’s how it feels choosing a man based on location, age, race, profession and a couple of photos. In the olden days (when people looked up from the...